T: 1047, this is…Thelma :)
Lady on the phone: Hi…um, I have a question and…you’re probably going to think I’m crazy, but…well, my boyfriend lives in Northwest Alabama and he wants to have a threesome and he asked me to find another girl but I’m not from here and I don’t know where to find one.
T: ...Ummm...
Lady: Please don’t laugh. I’m sorry, I know this sounds crazy but I’m being serious.
T: ...Uhhhhhh... (gesturing to Lo for some help) ...I know exactly who you need to talk to. Hang on a sec... (hands phone to Lo)
Cut to 15 minutes later
Lady on the phone: So...that's not a normal threesome?
Lo: Uh....no. Wait, how serious is this relationship?
Lady: Well, we've been together off and on for 35 years
Lo: Ok...
Lady: I should just block his number, huh?
Lo: Yes.
Obviously, Lo got all the deets on exactly what was to happen during this threesome. Nasty. We couldn’t post any of it. Try to imagine the dirtiest porn flick you can think of and then multiply it by 10 and it’s probably not as X-Rated as this scenario.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Welcome Back (Hot &) Hotter
Welcome back guys! We're here to introduce a new little addition to our blog: a weekly-ish featurette entitled "Overheard at the Bar"...names will be changed to protect the "innocent." (If you feel your code name is too obvious, alert us immediately and changes will be made ASAP).
So...off we go!
Overheard at "the 7":
So this girl came in to happy hour last night, and I've never seen her before. But after my shift, I sat and had a couple drinks with MGD, and she was begging us to take her to 322. Of course we both said no. Then she started writing notes to MGD asking if he and I would go home with her. It was....strange.......
Wow. Quite the weirdo, no?
Please share any stories you may have overheard this past weekend...lord knows they're out there!
Oh and, stay tuned for the possibilities of many parties in the upcoming Talk Like a Pirate Day/Football Game Days/Halloween/Turkey Day/Lo's B'day/Christmas season of getting crunk!!
So...off we go!
Overheard at "the 7":
So this girl came in to happy hour last night, and I've never seen her before. But after my shift, I sat and had a couple drinks with MGD, and she was begging us to take her to 322. Of course we both said no. Then she started writing notes to MGD asking if he and I would go home with her. It was....strange.......
Wow. Quite the weirdo, no?
Please share any stories you may have overheard this past weekend...lord knows they're out there!
Oh and, stay tuned for the possibilities of many parties in the upcoming Talk Like a Pirate Day/Football Game Days/Halloween/Turkey Day/Lo's B'day/Christmas season of getting crunk!!
Monday, June 22, 2009
Birthdays!!!!!!!!
A very special Happy Birthday from Lo to T!!! And a Happy Belated Birthday from T-Lo to Manny :D Hope all the daddies had a Happy Father's Day as well.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
We're baaaaaaaack!
Um...hi. We’re really sorry about the extended hiatus, but shit has pretty much hit the fan in our lives lately. We don’t want to go into too much detail but suffice it to say that Thelma and Louise both have new scars and one of us has a new work address among many, many other things. We can still be found at Joe’s or the 7 but with less frequency as the money isn’t pouring in these days...of course, our readers are always more than welcome to buy us drinks as we will never, EVER turn them down...well, maybe jager-bombs after 2 or 3 in the morning aren’t a good idea...
Hugs and whiskey shots!
T-Lo
Hugs and whiskey shots!
T-Lo
Monday, March 9, 2009
Mondays are stupid
First words spoken this morning:
Louise: Uuuggghhh I don’t want to go to woooork!
Thelma: Uhhh yeah, this blows…
If it weren’t for us having so much fun last night, we’d be super pissed off about Monday today. For the first time since I can remember, we actually did stuff on a Sunday. We were pretty booked, to be honest.
The day started with a trip downtown to the Physician’s Cookin’ (not Cokin’) Roundup. Manny went with us and we ate lots of chili. I never found the wild game chili, but the white chili was sooooo good! We also tried the first place winning chili. It was a traditional chili except made with turkey. I’m not sure why it won first place. It wasn’t even as good as Wendy’s chili. But, whatever. Benny played which was a huge surprise and made the day even better! Of course we had to go to the stage to say hi. Lo dared me to request “Long Black Veil” on a cocktail napkin (if you didn’t know, I request that song on a bar nap every time Ben plays at the 7), so I did. Good times!
Afterward the three of us argued back and fourth for a while about whether or not we were going out east to get ice cream. I had a rice krispies treat from the cookin’ roundup so I was good to go, but I joined in on the ice cream debate anyway :). We ended up just going home and relaxing before out next event: A very special bday party!
Around 7:15-ish we arrived at Sinclair’s, fashionably late, per usual. We joined the Bday Boy ( we’ll come up with a for real blog name later) and his bday entourage (a.k.a. all of Lo’s coworkers) outside on the patio for some cocktails. We all had a great time, and then decided to continue the birthday fun at Joe’s. Last night was absolutely the best Sunday night, and quite possibly the best night period, we’ve had at Joe’s ever. We walked in a little later than everyone else (we had to make a pit stop at the house for some food) and took our places at the bar. The pool table side was completely empty but the bar side was filled – I’m talking every seat – with awesome. At one point I looked down either side of the bar and said to Lo, “There is not one person in here I don’t know and like!” It was seriously the ideal layout. TCO, Bunny, Dragnet, the Bday Boy, and several other peeps (who also need blog names now) were all there. Not only that but Tubbs had Casey Kasem’s Top 40 from 1983 playing! Who doesn’t LOVE the ‘80s?! Being slightly younger than everyone, little T didn’t quite get some of the references. Everyone got a good laugh out of that. Who knew that three-year gap was so big?! Anyway Bubbles, who will soon be our new bartender (this is wonderful news for us although we’ll miss the heck outta Tubbs), dubbed Sundays ‘80s Night! Heck yeah! At one point I made 20 bucks just for showing a little leg. At first I was somewhat apprehensive about accepting the cash gift because I kinda felt like a cheap hooker (except not as trashy-looking because we were sporting our cutest polos/polo dresses last night). But then Lo, a.k.a. The Voice of Reason, said “Just think of it as he just paid your next tab.” Sold! I gratefully accepted the 20 bucks.
Anyway, the fun of last night kicked the rest of the weekend’s ass, so today sucks a teensy bit less than most Mondays. So far anyway..,
Louise: Uuuggghhh I don’t want to go to woooork!
Thelma: Uhhh yeah, this blows…
If it weren’t for us having so much fun last night, we’d be super pissed off about Monday today. For the first time since I can remember, we actually did stuff on a Sunday. We were pretty booked, to be honest.
The day started with a trip downtown to the Physician’s Cookin’ (not Cokin’) Roundup. Manny went with us and we ate lots of chili. I never found the wild game chili, but the white chili was sooooo good! We also tried the first place winning chili. It was a traditional chili except made with turkey. I’m not sure why it won first place. It wasn’t even as good as Wendy’s chili. But, whatever. Benny played which was a huge surprise and made the day even better! Of course we had to go to the stage to say hi. Lo dared me to request “Long Black Veil” on a cocktail napkin (if you didn’t know, I request that song on a bar nap every time Ben plays at the 7), so I did. Good times!
Afterward the three of us argued back and fourth for a while about whether or not we were going out east to get ice cream. I had a rice krispies treat from the cookin’ roundup so I was good to go, but I joined in on the ice cream debate anyway :). We ended up just going home and relaxing before out next event: A very special bday party!
Around 7:15-ish we arrived at Sinclair’s, fashionably late, per usual. We joined the Bday Boy ( we’ll come up with a for real blog name later) and his bday entourage (a.k.a. all of Lo’s coworkers) outside on the patio for some cocktails. We all had a great time, and then decided to continue the birthday fun at Joe’s. Last night was absolutely the best Sunday night, and quite possibly the best night period, we’ve had at Joe’s ever. We walked in a little later than everyone else (we had to make a pit stop at the house for some food) and took our places at the bar. The pool table side was completely empty but the bar side was filled – I’m talking every seat – with awesome. At one point I looked down either side of the bar and said to Lo, “There is not one person in here I don’t know and like!” It was seriously the ideal layout. TCO, Bunny, Dragnet, the Bday Boy, and several other peeps (who also need blog names now) were all there. Not only that but Tubbs had Casey Kasem’s Top 40 from 1983 playing! Who doesn’t LOVE the ‘80s?! Being slightly younger than everyone, little T didn’t quite get some of the references. Everyone got a good laugh out of that. Who knew that three-year gap was so big?! Anyway Bubbles, who will soon be our new bartender (this is wonderful news for us although we’ll miss the heck outta Tubbs), dubbed Sundays ‘80s Night! Heck yeah! At one point I made 20 bucks just for showing a little leg. At first I was somewhat apprehensive about accepting the cash gift because I kinda felt like a cheap hooker (except not as trashy-looking because we were sporting our cutest polos/polo dresses last night). But then Lo, a.k.a. The Voice of Reason, said “Just think of it as he just paid your next tab.” Sold! I gratefully accepted the 20 bucks.
Anyway, the fun of last night kicked the rest of the weekend’s ass, so today sucks a teensy bit less than most Mondays. So far anyway..,
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