Everyone should by now be deciding which New Year's Eve parties with which to grace your presence :). If there are any super cool parties going on, feel free to post them here to get the word out! Everyone be careful traveling and/or partying, and be sure to kiss someone HOT at midnight ;).
We hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas/Chanukah with family, and thanks again to those who came out to T&L's First Annual Holiday Cocktail Spectacular! Please, please share any awesome and/or dreadful stories from family time over the holidays! We need to feel like we are not alone in the dysfunction.
Much love,
T&L
Monday, December 29, 2008
Thursday, December 18, 2008
No, I do not have a dolphin tattoo on my neck.
This is how much sh*t we get away with: Last night we decided to hit up the 7 to get stamped before going to Joe's, that way when it was Roadhouse time we'd already be stamped and wouldn't have to pay cover. Jeez, we're smart! Unfortunately for us, instead of stamping the ever so inconspicuous underside of the wrist (that way no one sees it if it doesn't wash off the next morning), Lee decided to stamp our necks. Not so inconspicuous. Bummer. But we totally deserved it. Anyway, we tried to cover it up for a while but it was nearly impossible. Tubbs thought they were hickies (um, who's ever heard of a green hicky?). The Menace thought we'd gotten matching dolphin tattoos (seriously???). But we didn't have to pay cover at the 7, and since the economy's so bad right now we almost cried when I lost a quarter, it was totally worth it.
So, welcome home all you loud and obnoxious college kids! Perhaps I was once that irritating (ok, maybe last weekend) but honestly, how many frat boys do we really need in one bar at the same time? I think one or two, tops...and that's assuming they're buying us drinks ;)
Speaking of drinks, we're busily preparing for Friday's 1st Annual T&L Cocktail Spectacular. It should be totally amazing. And just a reminder, to ensure that you have adequate sustenance and libations, we recommend bringing your own drinky-drink (festive, preferably) and either eating before or bringing snacks with you (sharing is awesome!). We're providing snacks as well but we're not overdoing it since it's still unclear how many people will show up. Can't wait to see everyone at the House of Hotness!
Mwah!
So, welcome home all you loud and obnoxious college kids! Perhaps I was once that irritating (ok, maybe last weekend) but honestly, how many frat boys do we really need in one bar at the same time? I think one or two, tops...and that's assuming they're buying us drinks ;)
Speaking of drinks, we're busily preparing for Friday's 1st Annual T&L Cocktail Spectacular. It should be totally amazing. And just a reminder, to ensure that you have adequate sustenance and libations, we recommend bringing your own drinky-drink (festive, preferably) and either eating before or bringing snacks with you (sharing is awesome!). We're providing snacks as well but we're not overdoing it since it's still unclear how many people will show up. Can't wait to see everyone at the House of Hotness!
Mwah!
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Holiday Cocktail Competition!
We came up with this genius idea this morning that we’d hold the very first annual Thelma & Louise Holiday Cocktail Competition! We are brilliant! But then we wondered if anyone besides us would participate. So we decided to conduct a poll first. We’re thinking, if the ‘yes’ votes win, that Friday, December 19th would be a good day to have the competition. That should be well before everyone goes out of town for the holidays.
Anyway, the competition will involve each participant entering a cocktail recipe. No duplicates, please! We’ll most likely enter the beloved pudding shots. Or maybe we’ll come up with a new recipe and just serve pudding shots as hors d’oeuvres (yes, I had to google that). And to make the pudding festive, we could even dollop on some whipped cream with red sprinkles or silver balls or something! We love this idea but as always, our readers’ opinions matter most (sometimes)! So get your vote on!
Anyway, the competition will involve each participant entering a cocktail recipe. No duplicates, please! We’ll most likely enter the beloved pudding shots. Or maybe we’ll come up with a new recipe and just serve pudding shots as hors d’oeuvres (yes, I had to google that). And to make the pudding festive, we could even dollop on some whipped cream with red sprinkles or silver balls or something! We love this idea but as always, our readers’ opinions matter most (sometimes)! So get your vote on!
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
El fin de semana de Louise
Thanks again to everyone for a most fabulous birthday weekend. My tired body is still recovering from the awesome festivities. A very special thanks to my darling roomie Thelma and my wonderful bf who came in town and took care of me (and our bar tabs - actually, thanks bf's dad!) ;)
If you weren't around this weekend, you truly missed out on the magic. Hopefully, though, the pudding bombs/shots will make a glorious return around the holidays!
This week will likely be low key for me- we're hoping to make an outing to a very new and special restaurant to try out the food and spirits. Plus, Joes's and the 7 got plenty of money out of me this past weekend, and I gotta save up that cheddah to buy presents!
Much love to you all,
Lo
Friday, December 5, 2008
Are those pleated pants or are you happy to see me?
Haha we’re funny…
So yesterday was the official day in which Louise was brought into this world 27 glorious years ago. Everyone was most kind and many thanks to you all for making last night such a fabulous evening...but guess what. Last night was the dress rehearsal for this weekend. That's right, it's a Louise Extravaganza all weekend! Tonight will feature the same scenery but with a few new characters. We’re even hoping for a TCO (first-time mention) sighting!
Special thanks go out to Thelma, Thelma's mom (thanks for the pudding shot recipe!!), Turnip, The Royale, Law, Amish Menace, Dragnet, Bunny, everyone at Joe's and "the 7", Ben Hagler and Friends, DC, Tubbs, Bagz, Photon, Cody, Stew, our new friends...and everyone else! And a special "thanks for trying" to Eleanor who sliced and diced my hands last night in a late night round of play time.
Tonight is Round 2 (including more pudding shots - Thelma will be slaving away on her lunch break today since the shots were completely devoured last night) so everyone get ready!!!!!
So yesterday was the official day in which Louise was brought into this world 27 glorious years ago. Everyone was most kind and many thanks to you all for making last night such a fabulous evening...but guess what. Last night was the dress rehearsal for this weekend. That's right, it's a Louise Extravaganza all weekend! Tonight will feature the same scenery but with a few new characters. We’re even hoping for a TCO (first-time mention) sighting!
Special thanks go out to Thelma, Thelma's mom (thanks for the pudding shot recipe!!), Turnip, The Royale, Law, Amish Menace, Dragnet, Bunny, everyone at Joe's and "the 7", Ben Hagler and Friends, DC, Tubbs, Bagz, Photon, Cody, Stew, our new friends...and everyone else! And a special "thanks for trying" to Eleanor who sliced and diced my hands last night in a late night round of play time.
Tonight is Round 2 (including more pudding shots - Thelma will be slaving away on her lunch break today since the shots were completely devoured last night) so everyone get ready!!!!!
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Go shawty, it’s your birthday
That’s right, today Louise turns another year older! Much love and birthday wishes to Louise. She’s growing up so fast (tear). So tonight the birthday celebration continues. We’ll begin the festivities at the House of Hotness (it’ll probably be just T&L and a few pudding shots, but anyone is welcome). Next I imagine we’ll take the party to Joe’s where carbombs and more pudding shots will be consumed. After Joe’s, you ask? Perhaps we’ll venture up the street to the 7. Then maybe down some more carbombs. I mean, why not?
We are so predictable.
Last night was impressively weird. Louise and I decided to forgo Corner time at Joe’s because we both had huge projects that HAD to be completed last night – Louise had some very important newsletters that had to go out and I had some very important pudding shots that had to be made. Anyway, we decided to hit up the 7 for some roadhouse time (in case you’re wondering, roadhouse time is the hour or so at the 7 before the band goes on, and we love it) around 9:30ish. At first it was kind if dead, but the word must have gotten out that T&L had arrived because soon after people started rolling in in droves! Also, it was pretty obvious, at least to us, that the Montgomery Water Works and Sanitary Sewer Board have been experimenting again with that behavior-altering drug in our water supply. And it was obvious The Menace (er, Amish Menace?) hasn’t been drinking filtered water. Either that or he’s been spending way too much time with Jebediah, the Amish man that plagues us with our drunkorexia. Don’t ask (only because I don’t remember)…
Wow, COM (first-time mention) was uber-creepy last night. Something about wanting to be the meat in our sandwich? Gross! No, thank you! I kept accidentally jabbing this old dude in the arm with my elbow, and every time I did it he would look back at me over his shoulder. Like he didn’t know it was me! At first I though I was annoying him. But then after the band, Electric Voodoo or Trial By Jury (they are awesome, btw!), played a few songs this old guy tried to start up a conversation with me. It went exactly like this:
Old dude with questionable taste in sweaters: “So, you like the blues?”
Thelma: “Uhhh yes.”
......................................(awkward silence).....................................
Thelma: “Do you?”
Old dude with questionable taste in sweaters: “Yeah.”
Aaaaaand scene!
Of course we all cheered obnoxiously after every song. You know how this goes. Louise: “Whooooo!” JT: “Get it!” Thelma: “Yeeeaaaah!” It actually happens in that order. Every time. We like to keep things consistent.
At the stroke of midnight Louise turned into a pumpkin. JK! We all had a carbomb in celebration of Louise’s birth. I take that back. We all did not have a carbomb. Amish Menace was off somewhere doing, well, Amish Menace stuff………….
What else? What else? What else?......Oh yeah! While Amish Menace and I were breaking from the fun to round up a birthday pudding shot for Louise, some man I’d never met bought me a drink. It was waiting for me at the bar when I returned. Also waiting for me was a book of matches on which random man had written his name and cell phone number. I think he wants me to call him. I think I left that book of matches at the bar. Darn!
At some point in the night, time unknown, I did my famous vaporizing act. Louise stayed out at the 7, it being her bday and all. (Louise, did anything exciting happen after I left that you’d like to add?)…As you were leaving, the Epileptic (another first-time mention) bought me a b’day shot, Lee “sang,” I got a sloppy kiss from Hagler…thanked the band for playing my b’day party…did another shot of something and finally left. Hung out at turnip’s for a bit and then walked home…and scene. No, wait- I made a sandwich when I got home.
Now for trivia time! Can anyone explain to us where ‘Gumption’ came from? In piecing together last night, Louise remembered Gumption. Then I remembered too. But neither of us can remember what it means. I hate it when that happens.
We are so predictable.
Last night was impressively weird. Louise and I decided to forgo Corner time at Joe’s because we both had huge projects that HAD to be completed last night – Louise had some very important newsletters that had to go out and I had some very important pudding shots that had to be made. Anyway, we decided to hit up the 7 for some roadhouse time (in case you’re wondering, roadhouse time is the hour or so at the 7 before the band goes on, and we love it) around 9:30ish. At first it was kind if dead, but the word must have gotten out that T&L had arrived because soon after people started rolling in in droves! Also, it was pretty obvious, at least to us, that the Montgomery Water Works and Sanitary Sewer Board have been experimenting again with that behavior-altering drug in our water supply. And it was obvious The Menace (er, Amish Menace?) hasn’t been drinking filtered water. Either that or he’s been spending way too much time with Jebediah, the Amish man that plagues us with our drunkorexia. Don’t ask (only because I don’t remember)…
Wow, COM (first-time mention) was uber-creepy last night. Something about wanting to be the meat in our sandwich? Gross! No, thank you! I kept accidentally jabbing this old dude in the arm with my elbow, and every time I did it he would look back at me over his shoulder. Like he didn’t know it was me! At first I though I was annoying him. But then after the band, Electric Voodoo or Trial By Jury (they are awesome, btw!), played a few songs this old guy tried to start up a conversation with me. It went exactly like this:
Old dude with questionable taste in sweaters: “So, you like the blues?”
Thelma: “Uhhh yes.”
......................................(awkward silence).....................................
Thelma: “Do you?”
Old dude with questionable taste in sweaters: “Yeah.”
Aaaaaand scene!
Of course we all cheered obnoxiously after every song. You know how this goes. Louise: “Whooooo!” JT: “Get it!” Thelma: “Yeeeaaaah!” It actually happens in that order. Every time. We like to keep things consistent.
At the stroke of midnight Louise turned into a pumpkin. JK! We all had a carbomb in celebration of Louise’s birth. I take that back. We all did not have a carbomb. Amish Menace was off somewhere doing, well, Amish Menace stuff………….
What else? What else? What else?......Oh yeah! While Amish Menace and I were breaking from the fun to round up a birthday pudding shot for Louise, some man I’d never met bought me a drink. It was waiting for me at the bar when I returned. Also waiting for me was a book of matches on which random man had written his name and cell phone number. I think he wants me to call him. I think I left that book of matches at the bar. Darn!
At some point in the night, time unknown, I did my famous vaporizing act. Louise stayed out at the 7, it being her bday and all. (Louise, did anything exciting happen after I left that you’d like to add?)…As you were leaving, the Epileptic (another first-time mention) bought me a b’day shot, Lee “sang,” I got a sloppy kiss from Hagler…thanked the band for playing my b’day party…did another shot of something and finally left. Hung out at turnip’s for a bit and then walked home…and scene. No, wait- I made a sandwich when I got home.
Now for trivia time! Can anyone explain to us where ‘Gumption’ came from? In piecing together last night, Louise remembered Gumption. Then I remembered too. But neither of us can remember what it means. I hate it when that happens.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Things to do this week
12/3 Wine Tasting Seminar @ Derk's (5:30 pm)
12/4 Louise's Birthday!!!!!!!!!! Everyone come out to Joe's and "the 7" to celebrate! Partying will continue until Sunday afternoon ;)
12/5 House on Wheels at "the 7" (probably starting around 9:30-10ish)*
12/6 SEC Championship Game (Bama v. Florida); Watch the game and hang out at Joe's (3:00 pm)
12/6 Ben Hagler & Friends live at "the 7" (we love these guys)!!
*Check the December band line up for daily events at "the 7"
12/4 Louise's Birthday!!!!!!!!!! Everyone come out to Joe's and "the 7" to celebrate! Partying will continue until Sunday afternoon ;)
12/5 House on Wheels at "the 7" (probably starting around 9:30-10ish)*
12/6 SEC Championship Game (Bama v. Florida); Watch the game and hang out at Joe's (3:00 pm)
12/6 Ben Hagler & Friends live at "the 7" (we love these guys)!!
*Check the December band line up for daily events at "the 7"
Monday, December 1, 2008
Ouch! Is that a pain in our neck?
We hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving and enjoyed some downtime away from work and irritating neighbors. Louise and I were both out of town during the long weekend. We missed all of you and Cloverdale terribly and we’re thrilled to be back.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch…
During the past week we’ve discovered a few anonymous comments on some of our posts, all having the same pessimistic, disrespectful, and sadly immature tone. Being the geniuses that we are, it took all of 1.267 seconds to figure out who exactly is posting these comments.We keep deleting said comments in hopes they will stop. Unfortunately, they have not. Therefore, we will begin filtering all comments. We still want you to comment as freely as always; however, we would like to limit the negativity and ill-will to those situations over which we have no control. This, however, we CAN stop.
Happy commenting!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch…
During the past week we’ve discovered a few anonymous comments on some of our posts, all having the same pessimistic, disrespectful, and sadly immature tone. Being the geniuses that we are, it took all of 1.267 seconds to figure out who exactly is posting these comments.We keep deleting said comments in hopes they will stop. Unfortunately, they have not. Therefore, we will begin filtering all comments. We still want you to comment as freely as always; however, we would like to limit the negativity and ill-will to those situations over which we have no control. This, however, we CAN stop.
Happy commenting!
Friday, November 21, 2008
Unanswered Questions
1) What the hell happened at Joe's last night?
2) What the hell happened at the 7 last night?
Any answers are appreciated. Thank you for your help in this matter.
2) What the hell happened at the 7 last night?
Any answers are appreciated. Thank you for your help in this matter.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Have we met?
Hi, we're T&L...we're regulars...we're not stupid. And despite our passion for writing, we also know a thing or two about math. In fact, my boss had me working on billing yesterday. So if you think you pulled a fast one on us, think again.
Anyway, tomorrow night from 6 to 10 is the "It's Better Late Than Never" Beer Festival at Hampstead. $5 entry fee for all the beer you can handle (but don't quote me on that because my memory's a little fuzzy today). 5272 Hampstead High Street.
XOXO,
T&L
Anyway, tomorrow night from 6 to 10 is the "It's Better Late Than Never" Beer Festival at Hampstead. $5 entry fee for all the beer you can handle (but don't quote me on that because my memory's a little fuzzy today). 5272 Hampstead High Street.
XOXO,
T&L
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Logobomb!
How fun and random was last night? This morning at work I pulled this bar nap from the 7 out of my purse: "Megan telling her asthma story...Lee: 'That's a long story just to say they missed your vein.'" Ha! Good times. Anyway, thanks to our very artistic friend, Turnip, we now have a series of potential Cloverbombs logos (also drawn on a bar nap - those things are handy!). And since we love our readers soooo much, we want YOU to vote on your favorite logo in our latest poll! We'd also appreciate any suggestions on the logos you might have. The winning logo will become the official logo of Cloverbombs!
I Can Haz Littur?
Eleanor here, writing to tell you all about my fabulous Monday night. So Thelma & Louise left me home alone...again. I was really not pleased with this...I mean, I'm the cutest kitty ever, and they think they can just leave me??? Puh-lease. Anyway, I decided to get back at those girls. They were out having a wild time with their friends doing whatever it is they do that causes them to come home all stinky and balance-challenged. So back to my revenge...I made several trips to my litter box and grabbed a paw-full each time- btw, it is hard walking on three paws...maybe that's why T&L are always falling over, not enough paws. Anyway, I sprinkled litter EVERYWHERE. I mean, everywhere. On chairs, floors, rugs, you name it. They were surprised this morning. Haha...I'm a smart kitty.
Monday, November 17, 2008
"THE Weekend"
So most of you were there for our antics (and thank goodness or we would have NO clue what happened...), but for those of you who weren't, this report should humor you. I, Louise, took care of destroying Friday night while Thelma took down Saturday...and Sunday...
Friday: began immediately after work consuming wine in the hopes of drinking less at the bars which translates into smaller tabs...wrong. All this accomplished was the purchase of more drinks for other people and thus a still-large tab. Also, it was the Royale’s birthday so everyone was in high spirits (i.e. wasted) and thoroughly prepared to down some shots. Absolutely everyone was there, the Royale, Par, Thelma & Louise, JT, Bunny, Dragnet, Photon, etc. The Menace was sick however :(
Later, I ventured to the 7 with some friends after Joe's, but things get REALLY hazy at this point. There was some sitting outside at a table at which I def tried to give relationship advice- like I'm the expert- and then it began raining/hailing heavily. In one minute, everyone I was hanging out with dashed to their cars, and I, brilliantly, decided to stay. Upon realizing that I did not know another soul at the 7 at that point, I proceeded to call Turnip- forcing them out of bed and back out to the bar in the rain- to hang out with me. The rest of the evening has been recounted to me, but I have absolutely NO recollection of almost getting in a fight with some other chicks, hugging lots of people, collapsing onto the ground, etc., etc. Needless to say, Saturday was one of the most worthless days but was somewhat salvaged by Derk's biscuits (sausage, egg and cheese...yum) and bloody marys.
Saturday: began with Derk's biscuits and bloody marys (as previously noted) followed by one of the laziest Saturdays of all time. After wasting away an entire day, I, Thelma, headed to Joe's while Louise stayed home with her overnight guest. Joe's was weirdly dead which apparently was not okay with JT because he left me for the 7 after I'd consumed exactly one drink. I hung around and played (watched) pool with a few dear friends, Stew and Photon (you haven't heard of them before) and their married couple friends. And this is where things get interesting...
Suddenly I found myself peer pressured into going to 322. Yes, really. In case you didn't know, 322 is a gay nightclub complete with drag show. I had never been and was reluctant to leave the comforts of Joe's and the 7. But JT deserting me that night was the best (worst?) thing that's ever happened to me. 322 was THE sh*t. The trannies were amazing. One even called me up on stage after his/her act and revealed to the giant crowd of club-goers that "giiiirl, you straight, ain't you?" She also called me out on my homemade bow tie. I made it at Joe's from a bar nap and scotch tape. I thought it was cool, but whatever. What else?.....ah, yes. I danced in both cages and used the men's bathroom. Twice. In front of Photon. We danced all night. I danced like you've never seen before! Except for when Photon and I did the robot - you've probably seen me do that. It's pretty much my signature move. Anyway, I have no idea what time I got home that night (er, morning). But when I woke up the next day and started remembering details of the night before, it was awesome. Can't wait to see the pictures.
Sunday: was...it just was. A few things were accomplished like laundry and grocery store runs. Then after Louise cooked a yummy dinner I headed BACK to Joe's with the foolish idea I'd meet some friends for one or two drinks and come home early. Wrong. Oh, I came home early alright. Do I remember coming home? No. Do I remember who had to drive me home since I was clearly in no condition to drive myself, and therefore had to leave my car in the parking lot of the 7? No. Do I remember how many carbombs I consumed? No. I don't remember anything after #3. Do I remember hiding the Menace's wallet in my purse and then refusing to give it back? Uhh...did I really do that? Yes, because I still have his wallet. These details are slowly getting back to me thanks to the friends I was with who unfortunately didn't drink enough last night and now have to cope with the deep, emotional trauma caused by my black-out level inebriation. My sincere apologies.
Friday: began immediately after work consuming wine in the hopes of drinking less at the bars which translates into smaller tabs...wrong. All this accomplished was the purchase of more drinks for other people and thus a still-large tab. Also, it was the Royale’s birthday so everyone was in high spirits (i.e. wasted) and thoroughly prepared to down some shots. Absolutely everyone was there, the Royale, Par, Thelma & Louise, JT, Bunny, Dragnet, Photon, etc. The Menace was sick however :(
Later, I ventured to the 7 with some friends after Joe's, but things get REALLY hazy at this point. There was some sitting outside at a table at which I def tried to give relationship advice- like I'm the expert- and then it began raining/hailing heavily. In one minute, everyone I was hanging out with dashed to their cars, and I, brilliantly, decided to stay. Upon realizing that I did not know another soul at the 7 at that point, I proceeded to call Turnip- forcing them out of bed and back out to the bar in the rain- to hang out with me. The rest of the evening has been recounted to me, but I have absolutely NO recollection of almost getting in a fight with some other chicks, hugging lots of people, collapsing onto the ground, etc., etc. Needless to say, Saturday was one of the most worthless days but was somewhat salvaged by Derk's biscuits (sausage, egg and cheese...yum) and bloody marys.
Saturday: began with Derk's biscuits and bloody marys (as previously noted) followed by one of the laziest Saturdays of all time. After wasting away an entire day, I, Thelma, headed to Joe's while Louise stayed home with her overnight guest. Joe's was weirdly dead which apparently was not okay with JT because he left me for the 7 after I'd consumed exactly one drink. I hung around and played (watched) pool with a few dear friends, Stew and Photon (you haven't heard of them before) and their married couple friends. And this is where things get interesting...
Suddenly I found myself peer pressured into going to 322. Yes, really. In case you didn't know, 322 is a gay nightclub complete with drag show. I had never been and was reluctant to leave the comforts of Joe's and the 7. But JT deserting me that night was the best (worst?) thing that's ever happened to me. 322 was THE sh*t. The trannies were amazing. One even called me up on stage after his/her act and revealed to the giant crowd of club-goers that "giiiirl, you straight, ain't you?" She also called me out on my homemade bow tie. I made it at Joe's from a bar nap and scotch tape. I thought it was cool, but whatever. What else?.....ah, yes. I danced in both cages and used the men's bathroom. Twice. In front of Photon. We danced all night. I danced like you've never seen before! Except for when Photon and I did the robot - you've probably seen me do that. It's pretty much my signature move. Anyway, I have no idea what time I got home that night (er, morning). But when I woke up the next day and started remembering details of the night before, it was awesome. Can't wait to see the pictures.
Sunday: was...it just was. A few things were accomplished like laundry and grocery store runs. Then after Louise cooked a yummy dinner I headed BACK to Joe's with the foolish idea I'd meet some friends for one or two drinks and come home early. Wrong. Oh, I came home early alright. Do I remember coming home? No. Do I remember who had to drive me home since I was clearly in no condition to drive myself, and therefore had to leave my car in the parking lot of the 7? No. Do I remember how many carbombs I consumed? No. I don't remember anything after #3. Do I remember hiding the Menace's wallet in my purse and then refusing to give it back? Uhh...did I really do that? Yes, because I still have his wallet. These details are slowly getting back to me thanks to the friends I was with who unfortunately didn't drink enough last night and now have to cope with the deep, emotional trauma caused by my black-out level inebriation. My sincere apologies.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Way to go, us!
Congrats to Thelma & Louise for stepping up the blog! That's right, we are going to be the official blog of Future Montgomery Magazine - look for the announcement in the Dec/Jan issue. We did have to make one small compromise and that is changing our name from Cloverbitches to Cloverbombs...just wanted to make you all aware of that so you don't think our blog has been hijacked.
Yours truly,
Cloverbombs
Post-election Polling
Because we have to be weaned off of polls telling us what is really going on...
So after 6 days of extensive polling, we will finally reveal to you our theory (previously revealed in one of our first posts...). As we often say, it seems that we are, at times, the only clear-minded, non-dbag people in a 2 mile vicinity. What makes this possible, you ask? Well, we only drink filtered water. The City of Montgomery has been slowly dosing its citizens with some sort of crazy powder which our almighty Brita is able to extract from our water. So, apparently we're all just about split down the middle on this issue. Perhaps we'll revise our theory a bit...
More importantly, anyone have awesome suggestions for weekend events? I mean, other than Joe's and the 7???
So after 6 days of extensive polling, we will finally reveal to you our theory (previously revealed in one of our first posts...). As we often say, it seems that we are, at times, the only clear-minded, non-dbag people in a 2 mile vicinity. What makes this possible, you ask? Well, we only drink filtered water. The City of Montgomery has been slowly dosing its citizens with some sort of crazy powder which our almighty Brita is able to extract from our water. So, apparently we're all just about split down the middle on this issue. Perhaps we'll revise our theory a bit...
More importantly, anyone have awesome suggestions for weekend events? I mean, other than Joe's and the 7???
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
This weekend one of us hit Rock Bottom
No, your eyes do not deceive you – Thelma actually crossed the bypass and ventured into an alien bar out east. Without her partner in crime. The experience was horrifying from the beginning. As soon as she walked through the door she was bombarded by loud, thumping club music and a ginormous crowd of d-bags. It took her half an hour to get a drink (now you know why we love our Clovertenders). She lost the people she came with and was terrified out of her mind. The most heart-wrenching part of this whole ordeal? She cried…all alone, outside the bar. We were concerned it had caused permanent damage and that she’d be traumatized for life...
Fortunately Louise returned from the ‘Ham and the situation almost immediately improved. On Monday we decided to make a night of it in hopes of reversing the damage caused by hitting the craggy depths of Rock Bottom. Mission accomplished. All (well, most) is right with the world now!
Fortunately Louise returned from the ‘Ham and the situation almost immediately improved. On Monday we decided to make a night of it in hopes of reversing the damage caused by hitting the craggy depths of Rock Bottom. Mission accomplished. All (well, most) is right with the world now!
Monday, November 10, 2008
ΓΒΧ
Let's all welcome a new member of the Car Bomb Club family- Gamma Beta Chi.That's right, XBX has a little sister now- the Girl Bomb Club. Thelma, Louise and Bunny had a most fabulous night last...uh...Thursday? It almost didn't happen, though, as Bunny's timidity toward the car bomb showed itself - the skittishness was quickly quashed by the notation that a Girl Bomb had never been partaken of before. Thanks, Bunny, for helping us start this new tradition.
Of course if the fraternal members are present, the group will immediately defer to XBX, but if it's just the girls hanging out, there's no reason for us not to be able to enjoy the celebration and shenanigans associated with flavor-enhanced Guinness.
That being said, more power to girls chugging beer!
Friday, November 7, 2008
Is it really finally Friday?
I don't know about all of you but this has been possibly the longest week ever in the history of mankind. By only Tuesday we were convinced it was actually Thursday. And by 'convinced' I mean it literally caused extreme scheduling blunders and all around confusion. 'TGIF' never rang so true.
Now for the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard:
Last night we met some of our fellow members of XBX for a few drinks and good cheer (per usual) at Joe's. When it was finally time for a carbomb The Royale put in the order. Then...it hurts now even thinking back on it...Bagz said, "we're out of Guinness."
(I'll give you a second to mull over that one)....................
Just like that. Without the slightest bit of compassion. The entire Corner was stunned. I heard crickets. After what seemed like hours of silence we finally began our interrogation and discovered that the Guinness had only been delivered that afternoon and would take several hours to come to peak carbombing temperature. Not gonna lie - that explanation was not satisfying. Why weren't we informed beforehand? I never received a phone call, email, text (i can do that again, btw), nothing. Did the person in charge of ordering inventory at Joe's really not believe a single carbomb would be ordered last night? I mean COME ON!
Anyway, the Guinness should be chilled to perfection tonight so no worries!
And now for a little bit of awesomeness:
Did you know there's a mystery shot box at Joe's? Neither did we. Evidently how this works is you reach into a box that's kept behind the bar and pull out an index card. Written on these index cards are names of various shots, many of which the bartenders have concocted themselves. Such smart bartenders! Anyway, obviously you can't look inside the box when it's time to draw as that would totally defeat the purpose, but whatever shot is written on your index card you must take. Refusing the shot is punishable by complete social rejection as no one will like you anymore and something totally gross and embarrassing about you will be written on the bathroom wall. This game sounds like fun! May have to try it tonight. Except they won't let us try the game tonight - or ever - because they're afraid we'll rip shit up if we get that drunk...
Now for the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard:
Last night we met some of our fellow members of XBX for a few drinks and good cheer (per usual) at Joe's. When it was finally time for a carbomb The Royale put in the order. Then...it hurts now even thinking back on it...Bagz said, "we're out of Guinness."
(I'll give you a second to mull over that one)....................
Just like that. Without the slightest bit of compassion. The entire Corner was stunned. I heard crickets. After what seemed like hours of silence we finally began our interrogation and discovered that the Guinness had only been delivered that afternoon and would take several hours to come to peak carbombing temperature. Not gonna lie - that explanation was not satisfying. Why weren't we informed beforehand? I never received a phone call, email, text (i can do that again, btw), nothing. Did the person in charge of ordering inventory at Joe's really not believe a single carbomb would be ordered last night? I mean COME ON!
Anyway, the Guinness should be chilled to perfection tonight so no worries!
And now for a little bit of awesomeness:
Did you know there's a mystery shot box at Joe's? Neither did we. Evidently how this works is you reach into a box that's kept behind the bar and pull out an index card. Written on these index cards are names of various shots, many of which the bartenders have concocted themselves. Such smart bartenders! Anyway, obviously you can't look inside the box when it's time to draw as that would totally defeat the purpose, but whatever shot is written on your index card you must take. Refusing the shot is punishable by complete social rejection as no one will like you anymore and something totally gross and embarrassing about you will be written on the bathroom wall. This game sounds like fun! May have to try it tonight. Except they won't let us try the game tonight - or ever - because they're afraid we'll rip shit up if we get that drunk...
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Does Superman Wear Dennis Tillery Pajamas?
The above question was posed to us last night by our dear friend Cody. And Cody, the answer is yes.
We hope everyone has recovered from the political hangover that was the Wednesday after election day...whether your candidate won or lost, thanks for making the effort to go out and vote.
In other news, a very good friend, Mason, is leaving us for some Podunk town called New Orleans...I mean, why in the world would anyone move from Montgomery to New Orleans??? We are baffled...
We are unsure of his exact departure date, but if you see him out and about this weekend, give him big hugs and don't be afraid to shed those crocodile tears...
Enough about other people, let's talk about us. Last night was like a whole Saturday jam packed into a few glorious hours. We almost wrecked Cloverdale.
Just a little rundown of our activities:
There were our musical stylings with Beck (you can catch us at 8:45 at the Torchlight Lounge on Tuesdays and Wednesdays), Par's stories of a debauched youth stealing cop cars and cookie trucks, PB&J's revelations and proclivities towards exorcisms, Menace's ass-grabbing (nothing new there) and the awesome deer meat pasta (think he picked up his tupperware he stuck behind the outdoor light above Joe's door? Doubtful...), our awesome trip to Waffle House (after calling approximately 13 fast food restaurants to find them all closed before even thinking of waffle house) + rocking out to Queen there and back, nudie photo hunt, sneaky sons of bitches, girly shots...
Just for the record, we were basically in a nutritional deficit until around 1 this morning so the patty melt and hash browns pretty much brought us back to normal levels thus making our hunger now totally justified...lunch anyone?
Stay beautiful, Cloverdale
***If you would like to receive email notifications of new blog postings, please respond to this post with the email address to which you would like to receive those messages.***
We hope everyone has recovered from the political hangover that was the Wednesday after election day...whether your candidate won or lost, thanks for making the effort to go out and vote.
In other news, a very good friend, Mason, is leaving us for some Podunk town called New Orleans...I mean, why in the world would anyone move from Montgomery to New Orleans??? We are baffled...
We are unsure of his exact departure date, but if you see him out and about this weekend, give him big hugs and don't be afraid to shed those crocodile tears...
Enough about other people, let's talk about us. Last night was like a whole Saturday jam packed into a few glorious hours. We almost wrecked Cloverdale.
Just a little rundown of our activities:
There were our musical stylings with Beck (you can catch us at 8:45 at the Torchlight Lounge on Tuesdays and Wednesdays), Par's stories of a debauched youth stealing cop cars and cookie trucks, PB&J's revelations and proclivities towards exorcisms, Menace's ass-grabbing (nothing new there) and the awesome deer meat pasta (think he picked up his tupperware he stuck behind the outdoor light above Joe's door? Doubtful...), our awesome trip to Waffle House (after calling approximately 13 fast food restaurants to find them all closed before even thinking of waffle house) + rocking out to Queen there and back, nudie photo hunt, sneaky sons of bitches, girly shots...
Just for the record, we were basically in a nutritional deficit until around 1 this morning so the patty melt and hash browns pretty much brought us back to normal levels thus making our hunger now totally justified...lunch anyone?
Stay beautiful, Cloverdale
***If you would like to receive email notifications of new blog postings, please respond to this post with the email address to which you would like to receive those messages.***
Monday, November 3, 2008
Vote!
Ok... So we ALL know what a huge day tomorrow is! If there is the remote chance that you are going to be lazy or your car won't start or some other BS, go ahead and reply to this post...one of us is planning to go to the poll in Cloverdale at 4 tomorrow and the other is going to the one at ASF. We will be glad to pick up any of you, your friends, neighbors, grandparents, cousins, whomever...If that isn't enough motivation for you, listen to this: with an "I Voted" sticker, you can get a free coffee at Starbucks or doughnut at Krispy Kreme (lucky peeps in big cities get free Ben & Jerry's ice cream too)! I mean, come on, what more do you people want? Change??!! Ok, well that's coming either way...
Anyway, the Cloverbitches intend on being at Joe's tomorrow evening for an Election Coverage party of sorts...no bottle breaking, screaming or crying please.
Anyway, the Cloverbitches intend on being at Joe's tomorrow evening for an Election Coverage party of sorts...no bottle breaking, screaming or crying please.
Blind Item
And, we're off! Debuting blind item #1:
What murderous (of expensive pets) and traitorous (of every "friend" this
individual has ever had) has now moved on to a 9th (!!!) roommate in the
span of just 3 short years?
What murderous (of expensive pets) and traitorous (of every "friend" this
individual has ever had) has now moved on to a 9th (!!!) roommate in the
span of just 3 short years?
Friday, October 31, 2008
****REMINDER**** 1 Extra Hour of Partying on Saturday Night
That awesome time of year has come again where we are given one extra precious hour to do with as we please. For some, that means desperately needed sleep...for others, desperately needed car bombs and/or dancing. Regardless what your activity of choice should be for that magical gift between one and two a.m., do not forget to set back your clock! Failing to do so could result in some very embarrassing social faux pas later in the day ;)
Be careful this Halloween!
Much love from the Cloverbitches.
Be careful this Halloween!
Much love from the Cloverbitches.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Better hope we don’t find dirt on you…
That’s right. Poll #2 has finally closed and it looks like we’ll be posting blind items on a weekly (or so) basis! Yay for us! And the 14 of our 21 voters who voted ‘yes’ for blind-items! That’s a lot of voters, by the way. We’re sure impressed. Oh, yeah, and a special thanks to everyone who took precious time out of their busy day to click either ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ Your effort and opinions are greatly appreciated.
Anyway, be looking out for our very first blind-item. This is super exciting! Better hope we don’t find dirt on you…
Anyway, be looking out for our very first blind-item. This is super exciting! Better hope we don’t find dirt on you…
Thursday, October 23, 2008
The Corner
What would you give to have all your favorite people (a bar's worth: JT, the Menace, Bunny, the Royale, Par, the Ringer, Kicks, DC, Bagz, Tubbs and, of course, us with the occasional interloper thrown in) - think "Cheers" - stuffed down at one corner of a bar? Well, for starters, we'd gladly give up elbow room and personal space. See, even though there may be eight or nine empty chairs scattered down the bar, we prefer to take stools from other areas of the room and cram them into any open space in order to maintain the intimate environment of "the corner."
One recent "corner" experience involved the return of our dear friend the Royale and a certain party favor he brought along. This delectable libation I speak of is the highly coveted Firefly vodka. I say coveted because we happen to live in the one state where sale and/or purchase of this is forbidden. Don't get me started on this issue. Anyway, upon further research, we discovered that not only is there a "sweet tea" vodka but a muscadine as well. As a Southerner, I need not tell you how amazing that would be as a sipping drink or in making martinis, etc. In fact, we urge you to call and/or email the powers that be and request that Firefly be made available in the Heart of Dixie- where sweet tea and muscadines are truly a way of life.
And as always, come see us at the corner of the bar...
One recent "corner" experience involved the return of our dear friend the Royale and a certain party favor he brought along. This delectable libation I speak of is the highly coveted Firefly vodka. I say coveted because we happen to live in the one state where sale and/or purchase of this is forbidden. Don't get me started on this issue. Anyway, upon further research, we discovered that not only is there a "sweet tea" vodka but a muscadine as well. As a Southerner, I need not tell you how amazing that would be as a sipping drink or in making martinis, etc. In fact, we urge you to call and/or email the powers that be and request that Firefly be made available in the Heart of Dixie- where sweet tea and muscadines are truly a way of life.
And as always, come see us at the corner of the bar...
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Blind-items
To further explain how the blind-items work: We reveal, on a weekly basis, a tidbit of juicy gossip (but not the perpetrators) and you have to guess. We will not in fact reveal the answers, but this will make you all the more observant as you cruise the 'View!' We'll only begin posting blind-items if the 'yes' vote wins, so it's back to the polls for you, ardent blog-followers!
Monday, October 20, 2008
It's official
The first poll has closed. The results are a lot closer than we thought they'd be, but 9 out of 15 voters voted 'Hell yeah!' to Bunny getting facebook! We still can't account for all 6 'No, no...' votes, but we're just excited 15 people actually voted...
Anyway, hopefully this will convince Bunny she belongs on facebook. We understand it's only natural to be somewhat apprehensive at first. But, Bunny, you'll thank us one day. That's a promise.
Stay tuned for our next exciting poll!
Anyway, hopefully this will convince Bunny she belongs on facebook. We understand it's only natural to be somewhat apprehensive at first. But, Bunny, you'll thank us one day. That's a promise.
Stay tuned for our next exciting poll!
Friday, October 17, 2008
You're so dumb, it hurts.
Who could possibly screw up the following basic math equation?:
Joe's is not the only bar in this town
+ You know we'll be at Joe's
+ You can't be that stupid
GO TO ANOTHER BAR, YOU MORON
Joe's is not the only bar in this town
+ You know we'll be at Joe's
+ You can't be that stupid
GO TO ANOTHER BAR, YOU MORON
Monday, October 13, 2008
Since we are all so 'open and honest'
Just to put it out there, I'm sick and therefore very irritable. There are a few lovely people whose heads I would like to take clean off. I'm just sayin'. If you think you might be one of those people, perhaps you should just stay out of my way. ok. thanks. good-bye.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
It's time to vote!
Vote on issues on which your personal opinion actually matters! We've added a new, awesome feature to the now Official Blog of Cloverdale: The Poll! So now at the top of the page, under the photo of us at the beach (also new) is a question of the day/week/month (this will vary). Your vote counts and is completely anonymous - even to us. So get your vote on!
Thursday, October 9, 2008
We're famous
Well, maybe someday. But the very blog you're reading right now has been added to the blog listings on both al.com (that's huge!) and onlinemontgomery.com (not as huge but still awesome!). If you want autographs now, comment or shoot us an email.
In other news, we are pleased to introduce Par and the Royale. They're our friends so they're obviously cool. They hang out at Joe's and the 7 so you'll hear about them again.
In other news, we are pleased to introduce Par and the Royale. They're our friends so they're obviously cool. They hang out at Joe's and the 7 so you'll hear about them again.
Man down!!!
Thanks, Bunny, for the breaking news alert. Email update from Bunny. October 9, 2008, 9:37 AM:
"Ladies and gentleman, we have a car bomb casualty. The Menace's truck is still parked in his driveway at 9:30am. If any of you are at work to read this, let's have a moment of silence for our fallen comrade. "
Moment of silence begins now. Please bow your heads...
"Ladies and gentleman, we have a car bomb casualty. The Menace's truck is still parked in his driveway at 9:30am. If any of you are at work to read this, let's have a moment of silence for our fallen comrade. "
Moment of silence begins now. Please bow your heads...
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Meeting Minutes
For the first time possibly ever, XBX held a chapter meeting BEFORE 6 PM at a location other than Bud's! It's CRAZY, I know! Today's meeting commenced at 12:07 PM at Lek's Railroad Thai. Attending members of XBX were Thelma & Louise (obviously), JT and the Menace (unfortunately, Bunny missed out). And no, no car bombs were consumed. I'm being absolutely serious. Don't think car bombs didn't come up in conversation a few (dozens of) times. Hey, we're only human. Anyway, back to the minutes of today's meeting:
- JT does not like spicy food - stick to spaghetti, JT
- good conversation was had by all --> note to self: get the Menace some footy pajamas for Christmas (and perhaps a young Asian friend, if it's in the budget)
- perhaps we need to respect the car bomb a little more and quit abusing it so much as it has begun to retaliate in the form of killer headaches and a very strong desire for hibernation-type naps
- going to the laundromat is NOT an excuse for refusing lunch with friends
Friday, October 3, 2008
Who won the debate?
Does anyone know? Because we were unable to watch it. We went down to Joe’s around 8:30 and sat at the bar under one of only two televisions even showing the debate (the other 23 televisions were set to various sports channels). We realized we’d forgotten to print out the debate drinking game rules, so we came up with our own: basically, drink every time either candidate speaks. Unfortunately (fortunately?) after only a few minutes of this, the "debate" was immediately turned off per the request of the patrons of Joe's because it was a buzz-kill. Actually, the real reason it was turned off is because our drinking game was annoying the bartender :(. Apparently drinking games are more of a “home” activity…
Anyway, we missed most of the debate and obviously neither of us woke up early enough this morning to watch the news before dragging ourselves to work. So any feedback is welcome.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Thirsty Debate Thursday
We know there are several debate parties going on this evening mainly existing for the purpose of uniting with your fellow party affiliates (or friends that like to argue) to drink in order to distract yourselves from the embarrassing squabble that will invade every channel of the television tonight. One of us is having to leave town for the weekend :( but will hopefully be packed in time to at least catch the last few anxiety-ridden moments of the argument...er, debate (note to self: bring klonopin). Anyway, should the packing get done, we plan to be at Joe's to hopefully watch the splendor with some friends. There are, however, rules for the occasion:
http://wonkette.com/403206/palin-biden-debate-drinking-game-begins-now
http://wonkette.com/403206/palin-biden-debate-drinking-game-begins-now
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Why shower curtains are crucial
Were it not for a lovely light-tobacco colored shower curtain and several high-quality antiqued bronze curtain rings, I might have drowned in my own blood in my own tub. The shower curtain - which has sustained much abuse in the last month - is still the most reliable and possibly the most important accessory in our house. If only we could line the shower in bubble wrap...
Great decision making!
Going to gym after work...even tho there is free wine and beer here...but
what happens is that people (me) get drunk here and go to the after party
(joe's) immediately at 5 and then spend lots of money ($50+) and stay out
all night (2am) and then are totally wasted and hungover the next day and
worthless...actually, eff it. I'm drinking and eating free cashews and
pineapple chunks for dinner. See you at joe's?
what happens is that people (me) get drunk here and go to the after party
(joe's) immediately at 5 and then spend lots of money ($50+) and stay out
all night (2am) and then are totally wasted and hungover the next day and
worthless...actually, eff it. I'm drinking and eating free cashews and
pineapple chunks for dinner. See you at joe's?
Friday, September 19, 2008
"What's in our water?"
So clearly the Montgomery Water Works and Sanitary Sewer Board has been wreaking havoc on the citizens of Cloverdale by putting some sort of behavior-altering drug in the water supply. Unfortunately for us, we drink filtered water so every night we're left to stare blankly at the hyper-emotional and completely shit-faced shells of our fellow
Cloverdalites.
Our solution to this problem? Try to drink as much as possible in a very short time span in an attempt to catch up to our cohorts. All that this achieves is astronomical bar tabs and throbbing morning headaches.
Oh well, we'll probably do it again tonight...
Cloverdalites.
Our solution to this problem? Try to drink as much as possible in a very short time span in an attempt to catch up to our cohorts. All that this achieves is astronomical bar tabs and throbbing morning headaches.
Oh well, we'll probably do it again tonight...
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
XBX till we die
So we're going to try our hands at actually blogging about real things
instead of...well, you've read our previous posts. Anyway, we've gotten
really involved in an extracurricular activity to which we refer by its
Greek abbreviation. XBX. Yes, we have, in conjunction with some very
formidable drinking partners, started a fraternity solely based on drinking
car bombs. It is imiwa. If you haven't been invited to join in the fun, you
just aren't cool enough. Sorry.
instead of...well, you've read our previous posts. Anyway, we've gotten
really involved in an extracurricular activity to which we refer by its
Greek abbreviation. XBX. Yes, we have, in conjunction with some very
formidable drinking partners, started a fraternity solely based on drinking
car bombs. It is imiwa. If you haven't been invited to join in the fun, you
just aren't cool enough. Sorry.
Monday, September 8, 2008
"writing"...or what passes for it these days
I must admit, as little as I care about the reactions of some people, there are those comments which I feel warrant a response. As to "blogging," one of the most informal of communications through which an individual is allowed to rant in the most unstructured of ways- often rendering more of a stream of consciousness style than any other- there are few, if any, do's and don'ts. The fact that we choose to share humorous internet tidbits on our blog with our readers is our prerogative- at least we do site the original source and in no way attempt to take personal credit for the work of others.
We have attended truly prestigious universities in which our writing skills have been honed to a level of professionalism not garnered from a "creative writing" program at a satellite offshoot of a state school...after a previously failed stint at another state school.
Call us elitist, intellectual bitches...we've earned it.
We have attended truly prestigious universities in which our writing skills have been honed to a level of professionalism not garnered from a "creative writing" program at a satellite offshoot of a state school...after a previously failed stint at another state school.
Call us elitist, intellectual bitches...we've earned it.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Friday, September 5, 2008
Reality Show I'd like to See
Courtesy of Salon.com
Hangover CSI
It's like: "CSI" for binge drinkers prone to blackout
I'm tired of tough and craggy crime scene investigators untangling a mystery from the DNA on an empty Snickers wrapper. These boilerplate intrigues are so predictable. The real mystery is how the hell I got home from that cocktail party last night, or why my dress is balled up in the kitchen and sprinkled with cheddar cheese. "Hangover CSI" probes into the questions that have dangerously plagued many a Sunday morning late-riser: Am I alone? Did I do anything stupid? Whose handcuffs are these? The team of tough and craggy "Hangover CSI" investigators help untangle these riddles -- and bail you out of jail, if need be.
Hangover CSI
It's like: "CSI" for binge drinkers prone to blackout
I'm tired of tough and craggy crime scene investigators untangling a mystery from the DNA on an empty Snickers wrapper. These boilerplate intrigues are so predictable. The real mystery is how the hell I got home from that cocktail party last night, or why my dress is balled up in the kitchen and sprinkled with cheddar cheese. "Hangover CSI" probes into the questions that have dangerously plagued many a Sunday morning late-riser: Am I alone? Did I do anything stupid? Whose handcuffs are these? The team of tough and craggy "Hangover CSI" investigators help untangle these riddles -- and bail you out of jail, if need be.
We love to learn!
Urban dictionary: batshit crazy
1. batshit crazy
1. A synonym for Tom Cruise.
Tom Cruise is batshit crazy.
2. batshit crazy
adj. speech or behavior that is over the top, unhinged, self-destructive, or a threat to others.
Condition may be temporary (e.g. "Dad went all batshit crazy on me when he saw the cell phone bill") or prolonged ("Adolph Hitler was a batshit crazy megalomaniac responsible for the deaths of millions in 20th-century Europe.")
Did you see what Maureen wrote last week? Girl's been batshit crazy ever since Michael dumped her.
3. batshit crazy
someone who has absolutely nothing to lose. batshit crazy people are different from regular crazy people because of their attitude and activities. a regular crazy person would shoot at a plane with a pistol. a batshit crazy person will jump off of one plane with a knife in their hands, onto another, break the glass and kill the pilot ... and land safely. in order to be truly batshit crazy the person must do the most outrageous things every and still return safely.
crazy: throw a brick through your window
batshit crazy: throw a brick through your window, call the cops, wait for them to arrive, tell them what they did, and still get away.
1. batshit crazy
1. A synonym for Tom Cruise.
Tom Cruise is batshit crazy.
2. batshit crazy
adj. speech or behavior that is over the top, unhinged, self-destructive, or a threat to others.
Condition may be temporary (e.g. "Dad went all batshit crazy on me when he saw the cell phone bill") or prolonged ("Adolph Hitler was a batshit crazy megalomaniac responsible for the deaths of millions in 20th-century Europe.")
Did you see what Maureen wrote last week? Girl's been batshit crazy ever since Michael dumped her.
3. batshit crazy
someone who has absolutely nothing to lose. batshit crazy people are different from regular crazy people because of their attitude and activities. a regular crazy person would shoot at a plane with a pistol. a batshit crazy person will jump off of one plane with a knife in their hands, onto another, break the glass and kill the pilot ... and land safely. in order to be truly batshit crazy the person must do the most outrageous things every and still return safely.
crazy: throw a brick through your window
batshit crazy: throw a brick through your window, call the cops, wait for them to arrive, tell them what they did, and still get away.
It’s the weekend, people!
Is anyone else really excited about this? I don’t know about you, but we’ve had one hell of a week! Well, it was mostly just yesterday.
Last night…er, this morning…I came home from Joe’s and finished off those tacos. I’m sure they were delicious, but this morning I was suffering from some pretty mean indigestion. Tacos at 1 a.m. = bad idea. Moss (that’s a secret Thelma & Louise code word. Oh yeah, we also like to speak in code occasionally. But acronyms are still the sh*t)!
Since it’s FINALLY the weekend (not that that matters), you’ll probably spot us out at Joe’s later on this evening.
Oh, that reminds me! Last night I was sitting at the bar with JT, and some old dude asked me if I play shuffleboard. I laughed and said “Nooo-wuh!” He walked away but then he came back to try and negotiate. He asked if I’d like to learn how to play. I told him it’s not that I don’t know how to play – my granddad taught me years ago – it’s that I don’t want to play. He asked if I was “with” JT (I’m not, btw). I told him I’m not and then he said, “You should be, he’s cute!” Huh? JT, of course, was highly offended. Oh well.
Anyway, Joe’s tonight. I’m hoping I’ll be able to hang longer than usual. I’d like to also make it up to the 7. The 7’s another neighborhood bar. I’m not sure we’ve mentioned it before now. It’s more of a late-night place…unless you’re in to backgammon (???). Sometimes they have good bands. NUDIE PHOTO HUNT!!! I can’t wait!
Keep your fingers crossed the d-bag level is low tonight…
Last night…er, this morning…I came home from Joe’s and finished off those tacos. I’m sure they were delicious, but this morning I was suffering from some pretty mean indigestion. Tacos at 1 a.m. = bad idea. Moss (that’s a secret Thelma & Louise code word. Oh yeah, we also like to speak in code occasionally. But acronyms are still the sh*t)!
Since it’s FINALLY the weekend (not that that matters), you’ll probably spot us out at Joe’s later on this evening.
Oh, that reminds me! Last night I was sitting at the bar with JT, and some old dude asked me if I play shuffleboard. I laughed and said “Nooo-wuh!” He walked away but then he came back to try and negotiate. He asked if I’d like to learn how to play. I told him it’s not that I don’t know how to play – my granddad taught me years ago – it’s that I don’t want to play. He asked if I was “with” JT (I’m not, btw). I told him I’m not and then he said, “You should be, he’s cute!” Huh? JT, of course, was highly offended. Oh well.
Anyway, Joe’s tonight. I’m hoping I’ll be able to hang longer than usual. I’d like to also make it up to the 7. The 7’s another neighborhood bar. I’m not sure we’ve mentioned it before now. It’s more of a late-night place…unless you’re in to backgammon (???). Sometimes they have good bands. NUDIE PHOTO HUNT!!! I can’t wait!
Keep your fingers crossed the d-bag level is low tonight…
Refrigerator magnet
I used to have one. My dad brought it back from a trip to Paris (or Vegas – whatev). It was pretty. It had flowers on it. I can’t remember what kind of flowers, but they were purple. They might have been orchids. Oh well. That’s not the point.
The point is the magnet is gone. It was carelessly tossed in the garbage. “I didn’t think it was important” was the explanation. It doesn’t matter. The magnet didn’t belong to you. It wasn’t yours to throw away. Goodbye, refrigerator magnet. :(
The point is the magnet is gone. It was carelessly tossed in the garbage. “I didn’t think it was important” was the explanation. It doesn’t matter. The magnet didn’t belong to you. It wasn’t yours to throw away. Goodbye, refrigerator magnet. :(
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Phew! What a day…
Do you ever have one of those days that are just completely exhausting? Maybe because work was insane? Or because you had to deal with difficult people? Yeah, it’s been one of those days. May need a drink after work. You’re all invited (well, most of you…).
leave me alone...
seriously. stop contacting me. no texts. no ims. no phone calls. no waving in my direction. don't even look at me.
Blogging is fun…and a new addiction!
Yay addiction! One of my favorite things!
I’m also addicted to L&O (that’s the acronym for Law & Order). I’m addicted to all the spin-offs too. L&O:SVU premiers September 23rd!
I used to be addicted to buying new clothes, but I had to wean myself off that one once I went broke. Too bad.
Speaking of buying new clothes, have you ever owned the same dress in every color in a 48-count box of Crayola’s? Neither have I. That’s just weird.
I’m also addicted to L&O (that’s the acronym for Law & Order). I’m addicted to all the spin-offs too. L&O:SVU premiers September 23rd!
I used to be addicted to buying new clothes, but I had to wean myself off that one once I went broke. Too bad.
Speaking of buying new clothes, have you ever owned the same dress in every color in a 48-count box of Crayola’s? Neither have I. That’s just weird.
Puh-lease...
Wow. Amazing. It’s absurd how narcissistic some people are. Look, everything is not always about you. Seriously.
On a similar note, we were attacked today by someone who thinks this blog is all about her! Hilarious! I mean, we were berated. Verbally assaulted. It was confusing and completely unnecessary. Also extremely stressful and draining and that’s something neither of us need nor want in our life. Ugh.
On a similar note, we were attacked today by someone who thinks this blog is all about her! Hilarious! I mean, we were berated. Verbally assaulted. It was confusing and completely unnecessary. Also extremely stressful and draining and that’s something neither of us need nor want in our life. Ugh.
Acronyms and initialisms (thanks, JT) are the sh*t
Do you ever come up with nicknames for people you know or places you go to…or basically anything? Or do you just get too lazy sometimes to speak or type someone’s full name, so you refer to them by the first letters of their first and last name? Maybe you have a weak stomach and hearing or seeing a certain someone’s full name makes you want to vom, so you HAVE to use an acronym (or initialism) just to keep down your lunch. We do! All the time!
If we know you in any way, you have an acronym (or initialism). You might not know it (except you do now since you’re reading this blog), but you have one and we use it every time you come up in conversation.
Some of our favs: BB, SS, EJ, BCBAH (you don’t want to know – or maybe you do…), IMIWA (duh). We also know someone who has a cool initialism for a restaurant he frequents. LZR. Sweet. Good job.
Anyway, acronyms are the sh*t. We love them. Fun times.
If we know you in any way, you have an acronym (or initialism). You might not know it (except you do now since you’re reading this blog), but you have one and we use it every time you come up in conversation.
Some of our favs: BB, SS, EJ, BCBAH (you don’t want to know – or maybe you do…), IMIWA (duh). We also know someone who has a cool initialism for a restaurant he frequents. LZR. Sweet. Good job.
Anyway, acronyms are the sh*t. We love them. Fun times.
Having a job is cool...you should try it!
This morning Thelma and I went to work – I mean like actual jobs. The kind real adults have. Do you know what I’m talking about? We were both a little late, but at least we went in.
We went to Joe’s (the neighborhood bar you read about earlier) last night and had a freaking blast, per usual. So we totally could have slept in and decided “Hey, we’re feeling a little hung over this morning so we’re not going to work today. Nah, we’re not going to bother calling in with at least SOME sort of excuse. We’re just not going to show up.”
But did we do that? Absolutely not. We got up, got ready for work (which took all of ten minutes…oops!), I ate a bite of the tacos I ordered at Joe’s last night because I was STARVING, jumped in our cars and drove off to our jobs. I’m talking real jobs. These aren’t made up. No, seriously – actual jobs. The kind where you earn a living so you can take care of yourself. It’s cool…you should try it!
We went to Joe’s (the neighborhood bar you read about earlier) last night and had a freaking blast, per usual. So we totally could have slept in and decided “Hey, we’re feeling a little hung over this morning so we’re not going to work today. Nah, we’re not going to bother calling in with at least SOME sort of excuse. We’re just not going to show up.”
But did we do that? Absolutely not. We got up, got ready for work (which took all of ten minutes…oops!), I ate a bite of the tacos I ordered at Joe’s last night because I was STARVING, jumped in our cars and drove off to our jobs. I’m talking real jobs. These aren’t made up. No, seriously – actual jobs. The kind where you earn a living so you can take care of yourself. It’s cool…you should try it!
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
You're a turd...like the one you left in my toilet
you're smelly and ugly and fat and full of sh*t...
you suck the life out of everything you're around...no one likes you. poo on you.
today i almost punched my computer when you contacted me...stupid turd....i hate you. i love blogging. i've been blogging since i was twelve- note the date of my last blog...then i wanted to throw my phone across the effing room...but alas, I would have to pay for it! you make me sick...will you please leave the country stat?
we're heading down to the neighborhood bar (aka joe's - you'll be hearing a lot about it). it's totally imiwa!
stay tuned for more blogs from thelma & louise....
you suck the life out of everything you're around...no one likes you. poo on you.
today i almost punched my computer when you contacted me...stupid turd....i hate you. i love blogging. i've been blogging since i was twelve- note the date of my last blog...then i wanted to throw my phone across the effing room...but alas, I would have to pay for it! you make me sick...will you please leave the country stat?
we're heading down to the neighborhood bar (aka joe's - you'll be hearing a lot about it). it's totally imiwa!
stay tuned for more blogs from thelma & louise....
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